trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
