It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
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