I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
