you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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