Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Randomize