ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
he told me I talked like a deaf person
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Randomize
