She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
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