Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
