Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
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