Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
