i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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