..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I wear drunk well.
Randomize