i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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