Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
