Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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