When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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