you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
