I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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