Its about making memories worth repressing
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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