It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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