I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
