end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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