Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
