At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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