Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
