dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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