"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
