Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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