i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize