she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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