I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize