I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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