I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Randomize
