how can u be prego again
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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