If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Hippo gnu deer
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
