is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize