She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
