Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize
