You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Randomize
