This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
