True but thats because hes a fetus.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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