i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
