Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
so let's talk penis.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
