you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize