my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
