i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
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