You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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