dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Randomize
