If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
