i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
