Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
